[ Expect the UNexpected ]

I've recently found out that we (Shawn and I) are expecting. So many mixed emotions come with it but overall I can't help but find myself overwhelmed.....with EXCITEMENT for many reasons. I'm one that always said I never wanted kids... I love my nieces and nephews more than ANYONE and ANYTHING in this world BUT I honestly wasn't sure of wanting any of my own- at least I thought I didn't. And finally after 6 years we're having one and I'm beyond excited to be carrying this child. Now I know we didn't do things the 'right' way or the way I wish we would've went about but I guess at this point its not about how we started but how we finish, or at least that's what I like to believe ;) lol.

Just the thought of this child being chosen to come to earth at this particular time means that this child....MY child was sent to me for a specific reason... to be a leader in Zion {YES REEEEALLLY lol}. It's a bit overwhelming to think that Heavenly Father picked me as a mother to teach and nurture this child the way my mother taught me. To instill in this child's heart and mind what our purpose here on earth is...what's right and what's wrong, etc...even though I feel I should be the LAST person teaching that haha ;).  I just hope and pray that thru my own life experiences and choices that I can be a mother like mine...one so bold and honest with unwavering faith and hope in ME **teardrop** I know I've been such a disappointment to my parents with this kind of news and regardless the hurt that I bring them my mother remains by my side. I hope I can be HALF the woman she is. We have our differences and majority of the time are disagreeing about my decisions yet she still holds her arms out to me and willing to take me in no matter what {best daughter right? lol} I truly am grateful and blessed so much to have her as MY mother.

...back to the pregnancy...

This is a whole new "adventure" for me... A life I knew I'd run into if I chose to make certain decisions. I knew the consequences that would follow, at one point Shawn and I actually took a break from each other and "dated around" and that was a blast lol.....but it just wasn't the same with out him. I guess you could say fate brought us back together... ;)
Life carried on........
This time together our plates full of opportunity and life. Shawn was back at the U of U for school & football. Soon after much perseverence & hard work he was given a scholarship which helped him tremendously. It motivated him to work harder and do better.... After this last year at the U he started working with an agent who is just AMAZING to say the very least. So if all works out Shawn will have reached a dream come true, and I'd be so happy for him. :)
I on the other hand  was blessed with my own opportunities that filled my plate quickly.... I  upgraded at work to full time, practically dedicated my life to Delta haha... Not to long after opportunity knocked at my door again... I was picked up as a Internet Video Host aka Video Jockey for The Whatitdo.com an urban island entertainment website. And that has been one of the greatest opportunities I've faced in my life. I've learned a ton from it....still am.... And the people I meet thru it are the most inspiring people. I can honestly say I HEART IT- I want to do more with it. Not only has this opportunity come my way but as well as another with MuSiC! So many offers by so many talented successful people, i cant help but feel blessed and ready to tackle another dream.

While doing our best to stay on top of our grind {haha} mine and Shawn's relationship has definitely grown, marriage was never really a question with us, we knew we wanted to but picking the time was always in the air. With everything going on in our lives I made every excuse of "why NOT to get married" i still wanted to 'PLAY' i guess. I had a whole list of places to travel.... And so many things i would put in my life before marriage. Why? I don't know. But even with that this patient guy of mine insisted we tie the knot, for so many valid reasons (like this one lol). I knew i didn't want anyone else..I knew that Shawn was the main reason me and any other guy never worked out. I mean... those who know us know we are the furthest from perfect, but we try, and we make it work- and with all of the above going on in our lives- getting prego was the last thing we had expected.  But now that we are...I am... I know it's gonna put things in my life on hold for a little. I dont know if i was afraid of marriage commitment or what but i just thought i never wanted to settle down. Since we've found out I've sat and reflected on my own life thus far and to my surprise I've pretty much done EVERYTHING I've wanted to. I've "played" with my friends... I've done the whole 'going out' thing....I've danced on the road, I've travelled, I've gone international, I've met so many people, I've made music, I've been and won beauty pageants, I've tasted the college life (and still need to finish), I've been in an independent film (that I'm still waiting to see lol), I've spent money like crazy on useless things, I've dated around,  I've done so many things that I can say I'm proud of.....& not so proud of lol and but that's me. =)  looking over all that kinda reassured me that  I am without a doubt ready to just settle down. I mean, I'm not going to be a boring mom now but I'll at least slow down for a bit...I  thought that life would end if/when I ever got married...or pregnant, but now that I am... I feel like I have so much more to work for and I'm honestly so ready for it. 

I know this has been such a disappointment to SO MANY. I've hurt so many people I love with decisions I've made....but, I've made em and I'm the one living the consequences (so GET OVER IT if you're not haha j/k) Am I complaining? NO WAY. I actually consider myself very lucky. I have the best support system EVER. My relationship with my sister Lusi has grown in so many ways, as well as with my mom. It's crazy but I love it. =) at times i do feel alone. I do feel stressed. I feel nervous. Im scared. Sometimes I just wanna break down and cry because I don't know the answers to some things.... But nonetheless i am grateful that regardless of my choices the lord has still blessed me with such an awesome family, the most supportive friends,  the gift of motherhood. And because of that... I'm ready to expect whatever is unexpected....take it....run with it.... And be as happy as I can for this gift in me. 

[5 days in to Oct, and already all this? ]

If you live in Utah....or if you're LDS you know General conference weekends (Oct/Apr) are always ON & POPPIN' in the 801!! There are tons of conference events going on that are really fun....clean fun that is!!!! ;) This past weekend I had the opportunity to attend a few functions and enjoyed myself at ALL OF THEM!!!!!! (hence all my exclamation points!! haha) My conference weekend started a bit early. I've picked up on my music the past month and a half and was finally able to hit the studio last Wednesday. So I was singing every night since then whether in the studio, home practicing, band practice, performing, or singing for the sick- by Sunday evening I could not even reach my notes haha.....not cool. If you know me, you know that THE most depressing times in my life is when I lose my voice, I feel helpless in something I KNOW I can do. Anyway before I just keep blabbering on and on......which is a problem of mine, I'm just going to post pics and hopefully you can get a hint of what my weekend was like out here.

 Played w/my dad's band for the CCWS Alumni Reunion (a.k.a. Pesega Reunion) downtown.

If you're tongan, it's very similar to our Kolistutuku (however the heck you spell that lol), but Samoan.

It was beautiful and so much fun.

There was a lot of

 

....fashion show & dancing....

 ......EATING.....

 

...entertainment...

 ....singing....

Later that night I sang w/Josh Wawa @ Suave

check it out on Thurs & Fri's. 

It's the Main Floor at the Bay

{josh and my girlie Taylor Vaifanua}

Cheered for our UTES, even though we lost. I don't know who played on Saturday but it definitely wasn't the Utes. I have NO IDEA where our boys were because they weren't on the field. haha....

We SHOULD HAVE beat Washington. They're not even that good- BYU's better. ugh.... don't get me started. haha Anyway, it was still fun.......if you can't tell on mine and Fatboys faces. ;)

I swear.....there is NEVER a dull moment w/this boy. He's adorable and every reason why being an Aunty is the BEST!

....and of course cheered for my NEWEST, MOST FAVE BAND....

at the King Invasion in Provo, hosted by the HOTTEST promoter here in the 801.

Kulture Shock

..what ya know bout that ALL ACCESS pass???.. 

hahaha

 

I was so excited to meet up with one of our writers Greg (G-Writer). He had to write up an article on the concert, that you can find here. Common Kings are So Cal natives and since TheWhatItDo is out of L.A. we've linked up w/the CK's many times......they're just like fam. So seeing them on any occasion is always a pleasure and like a small reunion. I'm so big on stage personality...and that's what I love about these guys the MOST. They rock it onstage, and off stage....they seriously are the most chill people. 

Anywho, I can go on and on about em, but I won't. haha. I do got mad love for them though and NEVER do I get tired of watching them perform. =)

I was suppose to fly out to San Diego for the Dolphins and Chargers game on Sunday. 

I know....what was I thinking right? haha Well that's what my plan was. Then, Shawn asked me after the concert if I didn't end up going to the game in San Diego, if he could pick me up to go to GC. Psssh... I was like "WHAT GAME?!" haha it wasn't even a question. I happily missed my flight (and the game, and good seats, and field passes.........not complainging though lol) and attended conference with him. 

It was amazing, like I said in this post. 

After conference I headed to the hospital to sing for one of my really good friends (Bella) who had been in a terrible car accident just last week. =( And as hard as it was to see her lying there in bed I was happy to be following the inspiration from Presiden Eyrings talk earlier that day about charity. We sang our first song (I Know Heavenly Father Loves Me), and couldn't even get through it with out crying. The spirit felt that day was overwhelming and I loved every moment of it. I know Bellas in pain, but this didn't bring her down one bit, she's still the same silly, uplifting Bella we all know. 

It sure was a crazy weekend. But crazy or not it reassured me that GOD IS SO GOOD! The saying "when it rains...it pours." is just a small amount of what I witnessed this past weekend w/everything going on around me. He bleses hard and loves unconditional. I'm forever grateful for that and all that I do have. 

Hope everyone has just an amazing week as I did. 

XoXo

[ love these.... ]

It's Sunday.

I just woke up from my Sunday nap (@ 9pm).

Had a long (5 nights) of singing so my throat is sore. =(

I'm lazy.

I have a toothache.

Don't want to get ready to go to club T w/everyone else that's here for conference. haha

Although General Conference was lovely, my notes are all kinda scattered so once they're organized I'll be posting another blog. So stay tuned. haha

Ready to fall back asleep because I don't want to eat late

.....so.....

what better way to spend my time than blogging?! haha

Here's just a few things I absolutely adore. =)

RED LIPSTICK & NUDE SHOES

Red lipstick was always a MUST for shows. While all the other girls would wipe theirs off as soon as our show was done, I always kept mine on....NO NOT BECAUSE I WAS CHEEKY, but because I had swag (back then...now i am just plain boring lol). Red lipstick always looks good on brown skin. I think it's very classy no matter what you wear... and that brings me to exactly why I love NUDE shoes, theyre miracle shoes. If you own a pair of nude shoes you know they go with eeeverything. They also longate my short little legs....

False Eyelashes......they're fun.

And during shows I don't have to put on as much eye shadow.

I totally dig bold eyeshadows right now. 

Anyone down for a make up party??? ;)

Small skinny belts....make my gigantic waiste look smaller. 

I love simple outfits.

2 facts: Greens my favorite color & I love shoes.

No doubt about loving shoes, but lately I've had a 

'green' shoe fettish. Maybe I should get green boots for fall????

Besides being in love (and refusing to use any other as my main make up) with MAC,

I love everything PINK that they make. 

My last pink blush (from the Wonder Woman Collection) I bought is so much fun for blush and eyeshadow.

Funny thing is, I don't even like to wear pink. I'd much rather wear any other color, but lately I've been wearing PINK lipgloss and blush. Doesn't look as good as red, but it's so sassy and actually looks good in pictures {for me lol}.

Eating healthy is actually more fun than I thought. My mom ran a little babysitting thing out of our house when we were younger so we always ate nutritous meals. As I got older I totally slacked. Ate out more, ate more fatty foods, and over all...I completely just ATE MORE. haha... and the results in that {GETTING FAT} forced me to go back to eating healthy. hahaha...

Farmers Market's going on downtown and what's better than buying good FRESH food?! I've been trying to watch what I eat, and although I am guilty of giving in at times Ive been really trying to eat better. 

I feel better when I eat better [or healthier].

Something kind of nerdy, but I actually like taking pictures for my blog. haha... I have a Nikon camera I got about 3 years ago and it's pretty good. But my cousin that moved in with us this past summer has a nicer one. I'm not a photographer or editor of any kind but I do like capturing 'the moment'.... especially the unplanned moments....and sharing them. So I've been using hers. Maybe when I get rich (keyword: WHEN lol) I will buy my own nice camera...til then my phone, my Nikon, and Ash's Nikon will have to do for my blog. hahaha 

Do you believe in Magic? 

haha...that was our theme for Miss Utah (when I ran back in 2009). I love Disney everything. I like Disney World much better than Disney Land though.... The last time I went to Disney World was back when I was 15 I think. I loved it, and I know when I return in 2 weeks for my beeeeautiful cousin Kaities wedding I will still love it. haha.. 

I'm so excited to go, hopefully I can take Pili and LaVona with me. 

Last but not least..... I've been debating on what I want to do with my hair. I want to change it up. I've been keeping it black just because it's easy to care of, always looks healthy, and doesn't look to greasy if I haven't washed it for more than 2 days. I've always been safe with all black, however, I was thinking maybe do highlights again, but... I'm kinda over that. I don't wanna look like everyone else with their dark hair and highlights. Soooo poly...soooo boring! lol j/k so I thought maybe dark chocolate on bottom and lighter brown on top (kinda like Beyonces in her performance of Love On Top, announcing her pregnancy) but...changed my mind again because after wanting that it was like every girl I saw had that in already. ZzZZzzZzz.... right??? haha...

Well, I finally decided what I'm doing. talked to my hair gal and asked her if she could do it. What kinda question was that....of course she can.  So hopefully I can get this in before I leave to Florida... 

It's different but I love it. I wanna keep my hair dark (get back to natural) but I do want some color in it.  And what better place to put em than the tips? haha Only because I'm a cheapo and am too lazy [and broke] to keep up with dying my roots. Lol...

Well there ya go... just a few things I just adore... what's yours?

Oh one more. Kinda weird because I AM NOT.....I repeat myself I AM NOT getting married anytime soon, but I've had this thing where I've just been browsing...looking...admiring... wedding dresses. Who does that when they're not even getting married?? lol... I've always liked looking at wedding dresses. I love white and I love dresses. But I've never actually looked and browsed for different wedding dresses. So here ya go... one of my 2 faves I've found online. 

Aren't they beautiful? 

I totally dig the mermaid dresses. Even though I'd like to lose weight and get more fit, I have come to accept my body. My mom always told us that if we wear fitted clothes that shows our figure that will help us stay small. Now if you see my sisters and I, we're far from 'small' hahaha but that's so true. I've always worn fitted clothes and that's probably why I love the mermaid style. I love women that can show off their figure.... (not outta pocket kinda showing their figure lol, but ya know what i mean) 

And that's the reason why there will be no wedding anytime soon for me, as soon as I can pull off that look, I'll be ready. LOL j/k. I really like the styles of these dresses though. I mean of course mine will be modest ;) hahaha but i'm just sayin'. lol.

There ya have it....I'm done blabbering about things I love and adore lately.

[Friday Favorites: SLVR]

I don't know if I've ever mentioned how much i LOOOOVE shoes.

but

I DO!

I'd much rather receive shoes than flowers or chocolates.

....besides...they last much longer.  

When I attended the Magic Show last month in Vegas I fell in love with fashion in a whole different way. I totally look at Mens Apparel different now. When a man can dress....oh my gosh.....that's so yummy. lol... The other thing I absolutely fell in love with SLVR wedges.

SLVR is a break off of Adidas, just more on the casual side than the sports side. 

They look good with cropped pants and blazers (my fave).

I'm not too much of a tennis shoe fan, but gimme tennis shoes ON HEELS and i'll rock em. ;) haha

I serioulsy need to get a pair of these........or any of you can get me a pair of these, if you're feelin generous. ;)

Have a Happy and Safe weekend.

LETS GO UTES!

(btw, i'm counting down my days til I'll be in NZ for the Rugby World Cup to meet my Rugby crush)

[CARRYing ON]

Since I'm always ON THE GO, you'd think I was queen of packing. Truth is, I suck at it, especially if Im going more than a week. Most of the time I wait last minute to pack and it's such a bad habit because by the time I start packing (which is normally an hour or 2 before my flight lol) I just end up throwing my whole closet in my bag...and what makes it worse is that when I do get to my final destination I end up shopping and then I don't wear what I did pack. Smh.... So bad I know. However, one thing I do have on lock is my Carry On gear......
The things I must have on the plane or just away from home...

Carry On:

My dark Green/Gray Forecast roller or my Maroon snake skin Duffle....... Perfect for all aircraft over head bins and seriously fits everything for quick trips to looooong ones.

Beauty Must Haves:

Besides my norm make up bag, I never forget my good face wash. I never or at least try to sleep with make up on. That's so bad for my skin. Lately I've been using MK's face wash. OMG, it works wonders for my face, leaving it soft and smooth......I mean not that it wasn't already smooth. lol.... na j/k but for real, it's been great. I don't really 'break out' but I have very dry skin, so between keepin' it smooth it keeps it moisturized as well.

I have to have good face moisturizer for my dry skin, as well as my toothbrush. I LOVE brushing my teeth haha. I also always have Playtex wipes to freshen up too. They're great for freshening up after long flights...

Travel Uniform:
{very important}

I like to be comfortable when traveling, not only because I might be stuck in a middle seat between two fat OR hairy people lol....but also because I'm forever connecting flights (which I try to avoid the most), and uncomfortable heels are the LAST thing I need to have while trying to make a 30 min connection in a humongous Airport. 

Therefore most of the time I will wear skinny jeans (not because I'm skinny), a blazer, because whether I'm feelin it or not it dresses up anything from tanks to tees to dressy tops....

plus Its always cold on the plane so it keeps me warm. Every time I travel I take my nude heels....only cuz they match everything. I have a good collection of nude heels and that's exactly the reason why....
Nude heels are also my favorite because they totally longate my legs.

In Flight Entertainment:
I'm an Apple FREAK. I love all Apple products, they're just legit like that. ;) I have NEVER had problems with any Apple products....like I said, they're just legit like that. =)

When inflight I gotta have my iPad. This thing truly saves space and I love it. I have over 600 books. Tons of my favorite movies, music, music videos and my favorite tv shows. I can use GoGo flight wifi if I need, and it even allows me to catch up on work or even my blog (what I'm doin now), I absolutely love it. Best gadget for anyone always on the go....

Snacks:

Fiber One bars, a fruit, and Dasani water.... Easy and fill me up. But on the days I'm feelin good I will take my norm

i had to get a photo of this water.....I LOVE seeing this. (definitely ONLY in LA) haha and it's the best water EVER ;)

Grande Iced Coffee, 5 pumps Hazelnut, and half & half =)

A few other things I never leave home with out are:

**Ralph Lauren 2 piece:

I don't have the best body (and that its definitely NOT ME to the left lol- i only wish haha), in fact, i hate my body but I do love to get in the water...and most of the time I like to hit the pool or beach if nothing else, so I always have my favorite Ralph Lauren swimsuit; very similar to the picture on the left.

**Sunglasses:
it never fails, I always knock out before take off and for some crazy reason am up during flight, yet I still fall asleep before landing lol....so just so no one captures me sleeping hellah ugly on the plane I wear these. Plus, I don't wanna look all mohe when I land in some other city. Not cute....and not what it do lol....

**Conair 1/2inch barrel curling iron:

you know I can't be running around w/these nappy roots not hooked up lol.... I've had it for years now and it still works wonders for my hair.



Believe it or not, all these things fit in my carry on. I seriously cannot live with out any of these items while on the road or on the plane. What's in your carry on?!?!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

[Sundays @ Work]

I don't like to work Sundays.

I prefer attending church meetings, chilling at home with the family, or just reading and reflecting on life and ways of improving myself, because honestly, I need much imporvement in that area.

Unfortunately, I've become a slave to Delta {just last year} and that's not exactly the way my Sundays turn out to be.

Since I've gone full time I have not been able to hold any good days off.

Good Days Off = 4 hour shift with Fri-Mon off.

Well, sadly I couldn't hold those nice days off with every employee at the airport having 40 years on top of me [ :( ]............. (BOOOOO!) therefore I'm sitting at work every Sunday (BOOOOO AGAIN). 

Because I belong to 'THE' coolest team on earth my boss sometimes allows me to get my praising Jesus on by giving me the day off or allowing me to come in late....

(and sometimes I just have to bribe him and get him a plate lunch from L&L's, pork with extra mac. Can you tell I've done it so many times haha)

....and when I'm not as fortunate to have it off my Sundays pretty much look like this....



or...most days look like this. haha



* Laptop up with classifieds on KSL.COM, the greatest website besides facebook ;)

* Catching up on my reading on the ipad since I didn't make it to church.

*Cutting coupons

because I've been super inspired by this story in Japan and the effects of storage in time of need.

*Finishing up my make up because I tend to run late to work even though my shift starts @ 2pm.

{who does that?? lol}

and

*Changing my nail color {latest obsession} for the second time that day!

Busy Much?? hahaha Not really.I swear I do work when I'm at work.....but for me these are always good ways of relaxing on Sundays.

[HAiR]

I like changes...well most at least. Lucky for me changes with my hair have never gotten out of hand. I always hated my hair but through out the years I've learned to ACCEPT IT....bushy, nappy, and all. But more importantly to get along with it. A big thanks is owed to my own personal hair dresser/stylist, Saydee (who manages Taylor D'Shaw Salon). She's the bomb. I love her. I like to change the color of my hair and as many times as I do she never gives me hard time about it. I ask for her opinion since SHE is the pro, and every time I take it I end up preeettty happy with the turn out. 

Well before Miss Utah (back in 2009) I had black hair [blue black to be specific]

I wanted to change it up for the pageant but was advised to look as natural as possible (even though I look more Indian than Polynesian in the picture above haha), so with my roots all grown in my hair looked as natural as possible and ended up leaving it for the pageant. =/ It drove me crazy because I was so sick of the black because I had it in already for a little over a year. Also, prior to the black I had highlights....red...auburn....light brown...etc... so a week after the pageant I made an appointment and dyed my hair. 

Once again, I took Saydees advice and put these highlights in:

 

isn't she awesome?!

I loved em. I kept up with them, but then I got bored with them. If you dye your hair a lot you know how addicting dying your hair can be, well it is for me anyway. 

After a few months of keeping up with my highlights I decided to tone it down a little because fall was approaching and I didn't want to have a bright head during the winter...

sooooo I toned down to kind of a reddish-cinnamon color...

 It was a fun color but I didn't like all that red so I toned down even more... lol (dramatic right? haha)

As you can tell, as the pictures keep goin', hair color changes, and I get chubbier...maybe I should go back to blonde?? lol

I actually enjoyed this color a lot. It was like dark brown mixed with some reds. It was perfect for fall and winter. So i left it in, but once again got bored with it.

Now,  the thing that I absolutely hate about my hair is that when it's NOT scrunched, curly, bushy, and aaaalll natural it gets greasy so fast, I blame the products and tools I use but I refuse to go out in public with out using any tools or product. LOL 

I also know that washing your hair every day isn't healthy for your scalp because your hair needs those natural oils and all...but I can't go more than a day with out washing, especially when I have all sorts of colors in my hair. =/ 

Soooooo... I had to go back to black. 

Plus I needed a new hair color for the new year and new season. =) 

Therefore...I'm back to black. Cut my layers back in and am happier than ever with my hair. 

Thanks Saydee! =)

The thing I love the most about black hair is that it doesn't look as greasy when it really is.I can go at least 2-3 days with out washing and not have to worry about it looking all greasy. Yes, so basically I'm hiding my greasy head with my black hair. LOL. Black hair just looks much more healthier than the blonde or red streaks.

PLUS....black is more sexy!

and... brings out the wild side. Not that I need to be any more wild than I already am...haha

Also..I think it's pretty fun for spring. 

I plan on leaving the black in for a while, but who knows, maybe by the time summer comes I'll have some crazy color added to my hair. 

BTW, when I went to dye my hair black the new feather extensions had just come out. Saydee was showing them to me and I wasn't to fond of the feathers but then I seen how it looked in Saydees hair again and I just fell in love with it.....so I got feathered up before the 801 Groove concert. 

Thought it'd add a little bit of spice to my dull outfit. hahaha It's super fun too... =)

I got a bundle on the top and also on the bottom behind my ear just to longate the feathers in my long hair.

I promise I didn't just post all these pics of me because I wanted to, (i mean it's MY blog so i can put as many pics up as I want lol), but more so to show you examples of my different hair colors. Why?? eeeehhh I dunno... probably because I love my black hair and feathers!!! Dass why!! haha...

THE END.

[Just an Idea for my frustration]

So there are a lot of people and things that irritate the heck out of me. I mean I know I can be really...... like verrrryy......extremely annoying to those around me (especially my family) and even to those who don't know me, but what can I say that's just little ol' annoying me so whatever. lol... I try to remember that when others annoy me but i'm human and i forget....and then I get irritated and that leads to me getting upset. =/ No bueno. Well since blogging and keeping a personal journal is not only advised by church leaders but also very therapeutic I decided to have em both, to free my thoughts, achievements, failures, blah blah blah...all that good stuff.
When I was younger my cousin Tangi gave me the bright idea of having 2 different journals. One to write all the positive things in and one to just vent all my frustrations, kinda like a hate journal I guess. I took her advice and had 2 different ones....not such a great idea tang...cuz my mom ended up finding my "frustrations" journal because it was just a notebook (i didn't want to make it too obvious that that was a hate journal hahaha) and I got "the talk" after that like I was gonna commit suicide or something....hahaha. Which quite honestly, I've always loved my life way too much that that idea NEVER even crossed my mind. haha.... but anyway so after "the talk" from mom I never kept 2 journals. Later found out from Tangi that I'm suppose to take that "frustrations" journal and burn it......because really all those bad venting entries will mean nothing....so in the end it wasn't too bad of an idea but to this day I still never had another "frustrations" journal. LOL...

Anyway, point of my story is that instead of unleashing all my frustrations through blogs and even in my own personal journals when I'm upset I take a step back.....and before I begin writing a turn on my 'Sunday Sounds' playlist. Just a mixture of all kinds of church music such as MoTab, One Voice, Musical Truth, etc... It really helps take away the frustration

of whatever and whoever is annoying me. hahaha... Do I have issues?? Uhhh maybe! LOL.
That bright idea came from this past week at work when Utahs bipolar weather was a bleh.... and almost every flight of the last bank came in late which led to me leaving work around 2AM. Anyway, with all the frustration that night my boss (DrEw) who also happens to be my cousin had a mixture of church and classical music playing in his office. Surprisingly it calmed my nerves....and work wasn't so bad after that. So I figured if that could make me feel that way then what better way to blog/write journal entries when frustrated to that particular kind of music??!! =) Geeez....I'm a genius right?? hahaha.. Nah j/k.... It really helps. Because I was full on irritated about something and someone that I wanted to just write a blog and blast this person.....but thanks to The Wolfgramm Sisters rendition of "Did You Think To Pray"....that blog didn't get published!!! ;) So try it when you're frustrated. i promise it helps, you'll even notice how blessed you are and realize that what you're facing at that time of frustration is just a moment. =)

This video always comes to mind when I write in my journal and it's so true. I love the way it makes me recognize His hands in my life every day. =) Try it.....

Happy Bloggin Ya'll

[nails and manipulting?! lol]

I have a bad habit of biting my nails, only when I'm nervous, stressed, or have a lot on my mind....and that's almost always. HAHA

 I always have....and I hate it. I've attempted many times to paint them that way I won't bite em but...uhhh..... FAIL! lol.. For the past month though, I've been growing my nails out and it's been enjoyable. I get to paint my nails between flights or when I'm bored doing absolutely nothing.

See...

[Watermelons]



[Some Pink and Black design]



[Leahs OPI Nail Lacquer in dark gray]


I'm no where near professional, nor do i have a steady hand....shoot- I can barely paint with my left hand with out painting all over my right hand fingers lol... But, I love changing and practicing different designs. =)

Funny Story:
So as I'm sitting here blogging at my gate my co worker (an older gentelmen about 60ish) asks me if I'm those were my nails in my pictures.
coworker: Are those your nails in those pictures??
Me: (proudly answering) YES!
coworker: do you like to paint toes?
Me: No. I hate toes. If it's not a pedicure or shawn massaging my feet...I'll kick you. but uhh no I don't paint my own.. How bout you??
coworker: Umm no..if anyones going to manipulate my body, I wouldn't have it be my toes.
LOL... what the hecks that suppose to mean??

Happy Day Bloggers!! =)